Almost 18 months now since Jeanette’s heaven-going. Reconstructing my life since her passing has been the most intense challenge I’ve ever faced. It goes beyond grief or sadness or any mere emotion. My life could not have been more thoroughly disarranged than if a million puzzle pieces were thrown into the air, and now I’m tasked with picking them up piece by piece and putting them together. I’m overwhelmed.
I suppose it could be my imagination, but I get the feeling some people are wondering when I’m going to get on with my life. When am I going to pull myself together? Why is it taking so long? Or, maybe it’s not other people. Maybe it’s me. I get impatient with myself. I don’t need criticism. I am my own worst critic.
What do I need most? I need someone to clear a space in this pile of rubble and sit down with me. Help me sort through the pieces and find the ones that fit. There is One who does exactly that. He is the One who patiently endures my temper tantrums and pity parties. He holds me and dries my tears of sadness, frustration, or my mood de jour. He covers me and shelters me in my weakness and vulnerability. He speaks grace to me. He whispers, "Don't give up," as He hands me the next piece of the puzzle. “One by one. It's going to be beautiful. You'll see."
Sara Faith Nelson
Sharing the journey, because, I find there are so many others making the trek through life without a loved one